La Duchesa in a slightly waspish mood recently.
I came home the other night very tired: I'd had to drive to Milton Keynes no less!
I just said "I'm really tired"
La D's response: "So would I be if I was carrying all that weight"
Nice one, as they say...
Saturday, 25 April 2009
Friday, 27 March 2009
Fat people (like me) on TV
I'm fat (well, I like to think fattish).
I'm not proud of it, and I'd rather be thin, but still...
There's one thing that really annoys me about the way fat people are shown on TV (especially on the news).
When there's an item on (eg) obesity, they illustrate it with a picture of some fat people-walking along, eating, maybe...
The thing is, though, they never show their faces, and they quite often just show the torso.
What are they saying by doing this?
Two things: firstly, fat people don't have a face, an identity. They don't have jobs, families, interests, etc, like other people: they're just a big, consuming gut.
Secondly, they should be ashamed. It's shameful to be fat, so we won't show their faces, so as not to embarass them.
End of rant!
I'm not proud of it, and I'd rather be thin, but still...
There's one thing that really annoys me about the way fat people are shown on TV (especially on the news).
When there's an item on (eg) obesity, they illustrate it with a picture of some fat people-walking along, eating, maybe...
The thing is, though, they never show their faces, and they quite often just show the torso.
What are they saying by doing this?
Two things: firstly, fat people don't have a face, an identity. They don't have jobs, families, interests, etc, like other people: they're just a big, consuming gut.
Secondly, they should be ashamed. It's shameful to be fat, so we won't show their faces, so as not to embarass them.
End of rant!
Saturday, 21 March 2009
I think I'll have a nice bringe
There's a thing I've noticed people indulging in (probably including me) which I'll call 'a bringe': it's half-way between a brag and a whinge.
What it is, is when you appear to be complaining about how dreadful your life is, but actually you're showing off.
Example 1:
'Oh, it's dreadful to be as thin as I am. I can really feel my bones poking through, and it's terrible getting clothes small enough'.
Which really means: 'Look how skinny I am! isn't it wonderful? not like you, you fat bitch!'
Example 2:
'I get invited to so many weddings, it's such a pain. There's having to take time off work, the cost of a present, maybe a few days for a stag or hen weekend-what a nonsense!'
Meaning: 'Oh look, I know all these young, attractive people who are getting married. And they want me there! not like you, you sad loser!'
What it is, is when you appear to be complaining about how dreadful your life is, but actually you're showing off.
Example 1:
'Oh, it's dreadful to be as thin as I am. I can really feel my bones poking through, and it's terrible getting clothes small enough'.
Which really means: 'Look how skinny I am! isn't it wonderful? not like you, you fat bitch!'
Example 2:
'I get invited to so many weddings, it's such a pain. There's having to take time off work, the cost of a present, maybe a few days for a stag or hen weekend-what a nonsense!'
Meaning: 'Oh look, I know all these young, attractive people who are getting married. And they want me there! not like you, you sad loser!'
Monday, 2 February 2009
Snow day for fun
Pretty much a white-out outside this morning, with all sorts of dire warnings about the dangers of leaving your house unless you absolutely have to.
Nonetheless, I decided to set out for work (with 2 coats, a jacket, and an overnight bag with 2 changes of clothes in the car).
I did about 10 miles before deciding to turn back: firstly because it seemed to be getting worse, secondly it seemed likely that I wouldn't be able to get home even if I got to work.
Of course, I still don't have my laptop computer from work, as the Is from IT are still working on it.
Still managed to do a bit of work, though, using my own PC and emails.
Saturday night, we watched the 'Song for Europe' thingy.
Jade was a worthy winner, but I'm not sure how she'll go down on Eurovision: can't be worse than last year's, of course, and the Andrew Lloyd-Webber song was an ALW song, if that's the sort of thing you like.
I was amused by the 'cleaning up' of Jade's song 'Lady Marmalade', with 'Voulez-vous couchez avec moi' changed to 'Voulez-vous chantez avec moi'. I suppose the young kids who might be watching at that time need protecting against any suggestion of impropriety, but how many of them have a good enough grasp of French? Anyway, isn't the whole point of the song that it's about a prostitute?
The cleaning up issue seems to depend very much on which channel as well as what time, with QI (BBC1) using an enormous amount of bleeping while Gordon Ramsey (Ch 4) seems to be under contract to use at least 1 (unbleeped) 'F' word per minute on all his programmes.
Nonetheless, I decided to set out for work (with 2 coats, a jacket, and an overnight bag with 2 changes of clothes in the car).
I did about 10 miles before deciding to turn back: firstly because it seemed to be getting worse, secondly it seemed likely that I wouldn't be able to get home even if I got to work.
Of course, I still don't have my laptop computer from work, as the Is from IT are still working on it.
Still managed to do a bit of work, though, using my own PC and emails.
Saturday night, we watched the 'Song for Europe' thingy.
Jade was a worthy winner, but I'm not sure how she'll go down on Eurovision: can't be worse than last year's, of course, and the Andrew Lloyd-Webber song was an ALW song, if that's the sort of thing you like.
I was amused by the 'cleaning up' of Jade's song 'Lady Marmalade', with 'Voulez-vous couchez avec moi' changed to 'Voulez-vous chantez avec moi'. I suppose the young kids who might be watching at that time need protecting against any suggestion of impropriety, but how many of them have a good enough grasp of French? Anyway, isn't the whole point of the song that it's about a prostitute?
The cleaning up issue seems to depend very much on which channel as well as what time, with QI (BBC1) using an enormous amount of bleeping while Gordon Ramsey (Ch 4) seems to be under contract to use at least 1 (unbleeped) 'F' word per minute on all his programmes.
Tuesday, 27 January 2009
The IdioTs in IT
Work has been immensely frustrating these last two days.
We've had a virus infection, as a result of which they've shut down the computer network.
Result: I only have the use of my own machine: no email, no access to any commonly held data.
In terms of work, we're at a standstill, and I've come home early both days.
On a happier note, the meal was fine, although La D (in a foul mood) banned me from future kitchen adventures on the grounds of a couple of trivial sins. That'll all be forgotten next time she fancies a risotto, I'm sure.
We've had a virus infection, as a result of which they've shut down the computer network.
Result: I only have the use of my own machine: no email, no access to any commonly held data.
In terms of work, we're at a standstill, and I've come home early both days.
On a happier note, the meal was fine, although La D (in a foul mood) banned me from future kitchen adventures on the grounds of a couple of trivial sins. That'll all be forgotten next time she fancies a risotto, I'm sure.
Saturday, 24 January 2009
Cooking tonight
I've been asked to star as guest chef in the home kitchen.
I shall of course do my 'signature dish', ie risotto, which La Duchesa particularly enjoys.
Of course, the thing I really enjoy about cooking is that I drink a large quantity of wine while doing it...
I shall of course do my 'signature dish', ie risotto, which La Duchesa particularly enjoys.
Of course, the thing I really enjoy about cooking is that I drink a large quantity of wine while doing it...
Saturday, 17 January 2009
A follower: at last!
Like Jesus Christ with John the Baptist (is this quite correct ? :Ed), I have my first follower-and such a good one (the lady who inspired me to blog in the first place). Must mind the old Ps and Qs now.
Anyway, just thought I'd mention a couple of wrongly heard song lyrics which are (IMHO) as good as or better than the original.
There's
"'Scuse me while I kiss the sky" (Jimi Hendrix) which can easily be heard as "'Scuse me while I kiss this guy": surely a line just as redolent of the hedonism of the 60s as the 'real' one.
Also
"Going down the old mine with a transistor radio" (Van Morrison) which I genuinely thought for years was actually "Gunning down the old man with a transistor radio": which of us hasn't done that in their imagination?
Anyway, just thought I'd mention a couple of wrongly heard song lyrics which are (IMHO) as good as or better than the original.
There's
"'Scuse me while I kiss the sky" (Jimi Hendrix) which can easily be heard as "'Scuse me while I kiss this guy": surely a line just as redolent of the hedonism of the 60s as the 'real' one.
Also
"Going down the old mine with a transistor radio" (Van Morrison) which I genuinely thought for years was actually "Gunning down the old man with a transistor radio": which of us hasn't done that in their imagination?
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